Frustrated

Today, I let my life get to me. I literally had to go into my closet and let a few tears fall while my students were in my room.
Thursday I started a project on the laptops. It was ridiculous. We spent an entire day trying to log on and couldn't succeed. My second class got on instantly and had no problems. Lisa R came down to help and spent the morning calling emergency help desk, which got us nowhere.
Friday, the same thing happens. The kids log-in and the stuff they saved has just disappeared. WHY? Where does it go? There is nothing good about asking a kid to completely start over. Or, they log in and just still aren't connected to the network.
So I go and know on IT guy's door and the first thing he says is, "You know, this only happens to you."
Well, gee. THANKS. What I do know is that this is not my fault. There's eithe rsomething interfering with the access point or whatever, but it's not becuase I'm technology illiterate. I'm beggng for help becuase I would like to NOT waste classtime.
So immediately I begin getting told, "You could have tried this. Did you even think of this?"
I am not a fan of being talked to like this. So I hang in there. I try to ask and answer questions. Then, just becuase it's that kind of day, IT tech is jiggling around the access point and he unplugs it. Just a mistake. An oops. But now we have to re-start laptops, which takes a LONG TIME. It was an accident, I get that. Just frustrating.
I guess what I'm saying here is I wish when it came to technology that we had people that could teach us. Work with us. Come in to classrooms and help us with the network part when we're stuck. Have someone there to TEACH you how to troubleshoot when you're on your own. I can't handle-me, over-sensitive, over-emoted, hormonal lady who is still grieving-I can't handle being talked to in any way but calm. I can't handle being accused or whatever. I just want someone to teach me, to help me grow, so that every time this happens (which is everytime we use computers) I can do some of the troubleshooting myself.
I get frustrated with how some of the students/teachers treat technology. Sometimes that labs get to me and half the computers aren't plugged in, they're in the wrong spots. You get in the lab and computers aren't plugged in, the mice are missing, they haven't put aything into helpdesk. And then you spend the class period cleaning up, trying to get somethign to work instead of the kids actually working on their stuff.
I really want to give up using technology. I'm ready to go back to making a posterboard with pictures from magazines like I did when I was in school. It's such a shame. BUt me going home crying from frustration every day we use the computer labs is not worth it to me. And even if I wasn't over-sensitive, grieving, and hormonal, I would not be happy right now.
I invited Jan Wee into my classroom next week for her to see what goes on. Maybe that will help?